You try. You've always been a social outcast. Always one who people never responded to...always one out of the loop. No one picks you for groups, no one remembers to invite you. You're troubled and they won't notice at all. You go to other people and they tell you that you should, well reach out more. You do...but the risk just grows. The more you ( Read more... )

 ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ( Read more... )

I'm coping ( Read more... )

 AH THIS PLACE IS SHIT REALLY. I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE. SOMEONE JUST TAKE ME AWAY FROM ALL THIS SHIT. SWIPE ME FROM THIS FUCKING WORLD AND JUST LET ME DISAPPEAR ( Read more... )

 I know it's been one depressing post after another. It sucks I know but it's the only way I'll be able to feel better. The only way I can at least stabilize this emotional instability. The only way to know that I'm not depressed. I know I'm sad and breaking apart deep inside. I'm so tired already, tired of trying to be okay. Tired of avoiding him ( Read more... )

 Let's just say it's been about a day or two since the break up and I can safely say the tears did stop. I can say "we broke up" without tearing up and feeling like my heart was slowly being crushed. I wonder if he's the same. I doubt it though. I know he's still all torn up ( Read more... )

 I must be putting on such a good show in order to earn comments from my mom such as...

"I'm sure he cried and you didn't."
"How could you grow tired of him? He's such a nice guy."
"You must have someone else already."

Ah feels good to be back in this little box of mine. I don't have the energy to tell them that I did cry...and am still crying. I didn' ( Read more... )

 It's when there's so much of it that you don't know what to do. You've lost the very motivation to even get up and do something ( Read more... )

 I've filtered this blog entry to only you because I don't want her to know that I'm hurting pretty bad because of her. I want to cry but I told myself I wouldn't because it's only me being overly sensitive and vulnerable yet again. She didn't mean it in such a hurtful way but it does hurt. I don't want to hurt. I don't want to cry. I wish ( Read more... )

 It's one of those times when you ask someone how they are and they reply, "I'm with my gf right now," and you're happy for them really and reply, "Wow! Gf!" and then the next text, she doesn't know that she just through a knife and had it pierce straight through you,

"I finally replaced you."

Heh. I really should get used to this by now. For further ( Read more... )